Bells

Let us make the bell toll with gladness and happiness.
 

The saint's lives are like great cathedral bells which sound loudly for all to hear to great distances. St. Padre Pio was born in 1887 and died in 1968, enduring the passion of Christ in physical wounds which hurt and bled for fifty years.

Many people have been affected by his life and in many places in the world, even though he never left the cloister to visit. There are many stories about how he was seen in places far distant from the monastery convent of the Capuchins where he lives. He is even said to have appeared in the air in the midst of an allied bomber formation headed to deal destruction with bombing attacks. His appearance spared people in cities nearby. So we do not know how one thing will set another into motion.

I am encouraged by the fact that good things can happen in one place and be felt in another, good things and holy things, the result of faith and love.

In part, I was spared death in Vietnam so I may serve God in my own humble way. it has been an opportunity to witness many things that stir faith in many people. It is sobering to realize that we are not alone, but interconnected by our faith and because of our love. His purpose is to increase our faith by proving that we are not doomed, by the positive outcome of many terrible events.

I havenot been blessed with the stigmata like Padre Pio, and I am glad to indicate the goodness of His servants, some who have been declared saints and some not yet. But because of the arthritis and several other things over the years, i have been afforded a participation in His suffering redemption. No one should feel defeated or demeaned by suffering when one would prefer to be healed and suffering ended. But we have the choice to acquiesce to suffering, or to obtain the healing possible in the Lord. Service to the Lord is by our willing act, unless He explicitly makes note that He would like to offer us the chance of suffering to please His Heart.

The grace of the life of Padre Pio was great enough to span distances and time itself. That grace was loud enough to be heard anywhere the Lord can reach and be heard, just like a great cathedral bell. Some pull the great ropes that move the bell to make it toll, and some simply respond with love toward God when they hear the bell. Both are in plain sight of the Lord who is aware of all that happens, and whatever great deeds we have done will be known to all holy people with the Lord.

New Vows

 

In humility and need of you, my Lord Jesus and my Mother, Mary,I pledge myself
all my days, to You and no other until my days are done and I come
to You.

+

Solitude

 

Rise or set, there is no correct answer,
fortunately.

The deeper the solitude, the deeper the solitude I want.

God is infinite, and it should surprise no one that in His immense  infinity, He does not fit  into anything we can conceive.

It is in genuine solitude that you appreciate His greatness and His immense love. Solitude is a spiritual thing, not a physical measurement, like miles or kilometers. While one can retreat farther into a cave, it is not until you have gone all the way to the back that you realize how close everything is in being a living being. Clearly, existence does not define solitude. It is purely spiritual, which is to say, divine.

Once you have realized that solitude is existential and not mathematical, you realize how difficult it is to be truly spiritual in the midst over seven billion other human beings. And every one of the seven billion that exist all crave the love and acceptance of God who does not retreat away from us; it is we who are retreating away from Him, in terror of the materialism that defines all other aspects of life.

It is not possessing things that fulfills the human longing for unity with God who fills every place and everything and lives and moves and has His being in every moment of our existence.

If one craves real solitude, first of all, it is a divine invitation to us to embrace. There is no more certain means of finding solitude than embracing every thing that pains us and fills us with longings we can scarcely define. But of all the cravings, one alone is certain to transcend our limitations to effect a state in which we are close to Him in understanding, and that is in suffering.

Jesus provided Himself as the one efficacious and forgiving sacrifice which atones and satisfies all needs. The longings are silenced when death cuts us off from the longing to enable us to feel the fulfillment that is at the deepest depths of yearning. The possibility of union with Him has driven countless saintly children of God  to embrace poverty, solitude and perpetual longing. The most crass kind of solitude is called loneliness. A transcendance awaits one who chooses to love God as He is found, and not according to one's desires, because the gratification of the longing is a satisfaction of human longing and not the divine longing that waits our embrace. I have been on the cross a long time, high enough above the earth so that the blood drops fall on the dusty earth with a definite sound. From that distance, entering into the divine suffering, one sees adequately to appreciate His love for us. One day, perhaps, it will resolve itself so I may find rest in Him that satisfied.

Notice

 

Someone who thinks he is God's messenger and pet, needs to act differently than to deliberately call out the national guard and police on people who love this country and would love the opportunity to contribute to its defense and contribute to its financial well being.

People who are rejected frequently hold treasures  of wealth and prosperity. But i state the obvious. If people are aborting their babies so they are  not inconvenienced are the same ones who don't want certain people polluting their neighborhood with the breath of their life. 

The people who are stunned by grapefruit sized hail day after day need to think a little deeper to grasp the reason why. The picture ought to be a little clearer by now; pollution is a result of combustion waste. Until it is removed from the atmosphere, the atmosphere will continue in its relentless rampage tearing up neighborhoods, until the impoverished in the world are living like the wealthiest people on the planet. They will be dismayed when it all gets overturned and there is no place safe  from discomfort in the world.

At this time, we live in an era of awakening as a message of austerity finds its way into the minds and hearts of everybody. Don't ask God to be moderate with you  if you spare no thought for those already suffering lack and see only a black sky of need. 

Burn your bombs, seek  out the oppressed, the starving, those dying of thirst without relief, and the people who live isolated from other human beings. Forget your trade wars, and all other  kinds of war, and make a warm place for love to grow in your heart. If you cannot do that, then make your peace with God as best you can and prepare for the next  life.

Offering

If you do not feel as if you could console that Heart, begin by allowing your love to come forth like a fountain within your own, and let it burst forth in a torrent full of joy.

If you are suffering, offer it to Him; it is no ragged thing you offer, but the center of your being. That is His home; He made it so purposely.

Remind yourself that the Father helped the Son to mount the cross and die for you. If you think you cannot offer the Father His Son's death, think again. He is already dying waiting for your love, and if you will some day give it to Him, He will reveal Himself.

There are those who begrudge you the consolation of your own heart, and try to separate you from His Heart so you will forget to offer your heart to Him. Always look for a way to be in a position to offer Him your heart, regardless of how you feel. Do not let a feeling deter you. He will not allow anything to deter you from loving Him and receiving refreshment and peace. His love lives in these two things, so searching for His love is not impossible. Finding it is even less difficult.

Amen +

 

Memorial Day

Rest, brother and be at peace.

 I have no explanation for the joy of your heart within me, except to plead you never leave  me or bandon me. 

Forgive my sins as a sign to your children that you love them enough to pardon them, and give each one your grace and strength.

I cannot say I was a good steward, or even a good son of your gifts, except to say, You are so boundless in your love and happiness, that it spills over like a spring bursting out its confinement to leap up to heaven to be near with you.

I am not unvisited, and I am not ignorant of your passion, but in the manner you desired I have been fixed to a cross as real as life, and as incomprehensible as light.

Let your Light shone on me, and on all your children Lord, and bless them with Yourself.

Amen.

A Unique Position

 

The Mother of God, Mary, has never been seen bearing the wounds of Jesus, Her son. However, A different perspective may be obtained by dedicating our silence to Her in a penance that makes us not just worthy to participate, but ready and willing for Her love.

I am glad She was never made to suffer that kind of pain, but She was present when He was nailed to the cross, and in a mystical way, She experienced the passion fully, and on occasion, has been present as someone else received the Stigmata as She enabled her to do so. I refer to Saint Gemma Galgani.

If anyone can bear the unbearable, it is Mary the Mother of God. And yet, because of Her love, She is able to free us from sin and heal us of all things wrong with us.

All the things wrong with the world today are solvable by asking Her intercession to the Father through Her son. And for this reason, we should pray the Rosary daily, and ask for the solving all things wrong, the wars, the insolent rejection of Jesus and the Church, and the crimes committed everywhere which burden our hearts with pain.

The Mother of God knows what is wrong and how to fix it. At the same time, a great deal of gratitude and humility must be present to obtain our answer. If at first you do not receive what you ask, ask Her how to obtain the gift you seek.

Anyone willing to recall Her life and stand by Her side in the passion, should receive what they ask because they love the Mother of God.

The children of God are not afraid to endure suffering or pain in order to obtain the salvation of souls and the things necessary for salvation.

Useless

If He has given us light, let us do what we can
to be illuminated by it. Let no one think he is
useless in such great light as God provides.

 It is not alright to let someone crumble down to nothing and do nothing to help. At the very least, one should ask if there is anything we can do. The trouble is, that, in crumbling, they take others with them as the mountains fall apart atop of them.

One of the most egregious such events is the disintegration of donald trump, who, having torn up civilization as we know it, now loses control of himself and does nothing useful  in the process.

I can't help but think, there is something we can do, each and every one of us, to help save as much of our civilization as possible.

Nuclear war is no more inevitable than any other kind of war. And it is not alright to stand by and watch as aggressors attack peaceful countries and start destroying their civilizations without at least the dignity of a declaration of war. Flying in dozens of military airplanes loaded with bombs and missiles without provocation to drop them indiscriminately on helpless people is not alright.

On the other hand, cooperating with other nations whose  policies are the annihilation of entire populations is genocide, and unacceptable. Plainly, either we are for civilization or we are for annihilation. Religions that permit or foster the planned destruction of people because of their religion is genocide, and I will say it again, is genocide. There is zero tolerance in God' eyes for the planned destruction of peoples.

God permits many things, defying imagination and comprehension. The things He permits may means loved ones die, lives are disrupted and civilizations disrupted irrevocably. But those who are praying for the salvation of other people are righteous, and in enduring the unendurable, God is glorified by them in their suffering.

Before we were born, He planned to come down and live a life among us and give us the opportunity of participating in salvation and the exaltation of those suffering by being glorified by Him. The participation is living in and with bliss as much as agony, and for some, the two coincide in an unspeakable moment of understanding and peace which supersedes all that has gone before.

I can ask myself, have I really suffered enough to be worth enough to Him to be loved? The answer is always "yes", and when I can comprehend and encompass my experiences, I am speechless that there is nothing appropriate to say. To be silenced in such a way is astonishing.

My prayers are not always granted in the way I wished, but they are acknowledged by Him and He may be edified by our love.

Silence is exquisite, allowing us to experience peace, and in the peace, the love of God, and therefore, the silence is unspeakably valuable. Whether He answers us in a way we immediately comprehend or not, is not important; He made us, and gave us gifts that are immensely powerful; more powerful than armies, navies or air forces. But if we create them, then we must control how we use them. What He does with us depends on our actions. Dropping another megaton of TNT on top of human beings does not bring anything enjoyable on us, adds nothing to the bottom line and gains no favor from the Lord. Any religion that things otherwise is destined to a dark and miserable end.

In the end, if all we actually got out of bombing people was a little thrill, then we have lost our humanity, and our civilization has proved a worthless waste of time. We did not surpass ourselves in the last two world wars; our weapons have dehumanized us and our victims, and perhaps has cut us off from ourselves by cutting us off from God. He stands seeing what we did and what we planned to do, and we will have to try again. If current trends continue as they are now, we will create devices capable of destroying our planet itself while we stand in empty space. The feeling of solid ground disappearing from underneath our feet in a dark and airless void is terrifying at least. Having to wait for a comet strike to kill us is no more edifying than waiting for a warhead to ignite above us and reduce us to radioactive dust.

Pain

 

Today, my hands are full of sorrow, of loneliness and suffering, bearing forward unseen, carrying a cross where every empty heart shines in the light of God's love and is filled with peace and joy for those whose eyes will not close so the soul might see the Face of Christ in peace, being filled by the Holy Spirit with power to love and to disclose divine love.

Comfort denied, prevented, hurts twice as much because it thrusts pain forward in every gesture. He bids me go with Him, to suffer with Him, and demonstrate His divine love until I may rest in peace again seeing the gift of love bestowed brightly visible.

He asks for prayers with which to comfort all those who were forced to die by dictators, without any comfort.

He asks for all to pray for all those whose homes were callously bombarded by greedy selfish animals, and all the young lives cut off from life without mercy, and destruction.

Let the tongues who cry out for war fall off the beasts who crave war. In their place, all those who suffer at their hand should ask God for forgiveness and mercy over the whole earth until the sounds of hatred and violence falls silent.

I do not know when I will realize the pain has been alleviated, and God has walked among us again to assert His reign, but I do not whimper; but move with Christ until He is satisfied that there are men and women in the world who do themselves love God beyond everything and move forward until they meet Him face to face and the meaning of the world we live on is made manifest to our darkness with the satisfaction of Almighty God.

Penetrare et Perforate, sed sola Amore tuo.

Many people wonder about the meaning, the "why" of St. Padre Pio's stigmata. I think it was not a matter of worthiness, so much as the Will of God being embodied to serve the salvation of souls and the Church Herself. 

it may be the Church will suffer a great deal in the coming years, right along with the faithful and even the unfaithful of the Church, and perhaps, for the sake of having something sufficient to the need of the human race.

It is eminently practical that rather than several million stigmatists, there should be only one, taking on himself miraculously, the sin and need of the human race, with Jesus, which was sufficient for the need, but not encompassing everyone.

So, anyone who feels the same charity that St. Padre Pio felt kneeling before the crucifix with the Corpus hanging so near, knows the weeping and lamentation as he undergoes the imprinting of His crucifixion on himself as on a parchment of the needs of the Church.

The world does not exist outside of the Heart of Charity of Jesus. which is to say, he who encounters the love surrounding the place of the skull, encounters the Person and personal suffering of the Lord, Crucified. And he who encounters that, encounters Jesus personally, and not in some empty desolation, but in the furnace of love which engulfed every sensation of the crucifixion of Jesus. One could not experience the passion except with suffering the true pain and suffering of a human being who is also the Divine Lord.

It was all too easy to deprive Padre Pio of happiness by preventing him from hearing confessions, saying Mass or the ordinary joy of the existence of another human being. So, the miracle of the imprinting of the wounds of Jesus on Padre Pio was three-fold deprivation of the kindling of love in an extraordinary heart. But the heart was the first to be wounded, so that, in fifty years of bearing the wounds of Jesus, he might be available constantly and continuously, to intercede on our behalf of and for the salvation of many souls.

 I do not think one can encounter the person of Padre Pio and not suffer with him. Surely, as we are sinners, we are in need of healing, which abundantly encompassed all who approached Padre Pio. No one was outside the sphere of his healing power, the power and efficacy of his Holy Mass or encountered some disembodied wraithe, but he was wholly and entirely loving as Jesus loved in him.

I wanted to write this down before it wafted away from my old mind. If someone wanted to, they could easily carry me off like an old chair; it would not be hard. By the same token, it was not hard to do what they willed with the Padre, because he was so surrendered to the Lord, that he had no strength to resist His Will. O Padre, help my poor tattered soul !

I do not know how, but He has imprinted me, and I do not feel I can resist either, but let me know His love in your love for me, and enable me to be an offering, but one that is worthy in your estimation.

Deeper

 

To be a saint it is only necessary to be ready to love Him as He asks. It is amazing to regard with what love He deals with us. He is always ready to reach out to us in our daily, ordinary lives, constantly vigilant of any opportunity to please Him, whether what He asks is very little, or very great. Thus, pain that appears suddenly might be a request for more of your attention. Your soul might be fortunate to be asked only for your awareness, presence and willingness to be at His disposal.

If one's cross is small, so might the pain you share with Him hanging on the cross. On the other hand, the unbearable pain that can make its sudden appearance can likewise manifest how small our love is by the unwillingness to share any more pain than what is already at hand.

Often, saints have been saints from an early stage in their lives. They became aware of Him and the extraordinary nature of the love He was extending to them. Therefore, if you find yourself pierced through with pain accompanied with no visible sign of its origin, let your first prayer be to be able to bear it for His love, whether it is accompanied with bliss, or not, which is often associated with great sufferings. 

The trappings of modern life are such that they are captivating in themselves. They are capable of fascinating us with awe for their beauty and appreciation of human imagination which all tend to a level of comfort. What a surprise when we discover how extraordinary are His intentions to engulf us in bliss and agony all at the same time. One might even be tempted to ask how it can be unreasonable to enjoy one's place at such a sumptuous table. But the Lord invites us precisely at the realization of happiness at possessing what is possible in the moment. I testify that he has asked me abruptly on many occasions for reasons not disclosed, to embrace the unembraceable suffering, fully aware of its connection with His passion, and of His audcity to ask us. Truly, if we would love Him, we must be willing. 

His audacity in asking might be a sign of great importance to us in growing holier and less selfish and, indeed, selfless. Whether you are actually asked in an explicit way to suffer on His cross, or not, you must consider that He invites you to greater, sweeter love of Him, if you are ready and willing. If you are asked without a disclosure of His intention to permit your suffering or to permit its increase,life is eternal and so is His reward. Consider, also, that many other souls depend on your vigilance in willing to be aware of His desire for your company in a particular.

In the present day, wars break out, unprovoked and unjust, such as in Ukraine, but also in Israel and the greater middle east and even among our allies, that threaten wholesale destruction. If it is not that, then it is a personal crisis, a life-threatening physical incident, or even simply to loss of someone we loved. Giving the heart without asking for the reason, is the highest step before union, a selfless loving surrender to His intent.

I do not say it is always easy to say "yes", though often it is, simply to build our trust so we can be strong enough to actually persevere. Put yes is never trivial, but is easier if we have already previously been asked a lot and we have given the best we have. we cannot help but be closer to Him, and in being closer, we might be susceptible of being asked more explicitly.

How can I refuse You Lord. My hands hurt so much, and the least movement reminds me immediately of your cross. You touch them and make them holy to receive your grace and gifts. Let them, thus, be occasions of you grace and love, since you have so abundantly forgotten my sins and continued to be my Lord. I am only afraid I cannot bear the pain I do not know.Let my misery be the occasion of the greatest graces needed by my friends and enemies, so that it can be seen that you are love and desire from us only love, we who have been so reluctant. Quell the surge of fear the enemy launches at us, and let us invoke your love to protect us through anything.

Embrace me so your people may come to know the sweetness of your embrace, and strengthen their love to withstand the violence of the enemy,  show the world what it is to live in God and He in us, through love.

Apppreciation

Dear Padre Pio, I come to you for refuge
from my troubles, humbling myself in the
dirt at the foot of the cross where i belong 
because of my sins. Please listen to me
patiently and hear my petition from heaven
where you dwell with Jesus forever.
amen.
+

 I have gained new insight and appreciation of St. Padre Pio since the sudden onset of arthritis in my hip and wrists. Aspirin and some pain patches I can wear together alleviate some of the pain, but not all of it and stiffness doesn't help. Consequently, I don't write as much as I have been used to.

If you have serious illness crop up suddenly, A prayer to Padre Pio will be a big help; he has helped me so many times, I am in danger of forgetting what all he has done.

A humble heart and spirit will open his heart.

Discipline

 

Some people hear discipline and immediately associate punishment. Yet, discipline motivates us to take care of important things, like taking medications on time, and avoiding eating certain things because of heart health. Without discipline, nature herself would not be able to function.

And still, I am not talking about flagellation or beating one self. I  know people who are religious and "take the discipline" regularly. I never thought it accomplished very much for spiritual growth, whereas fasting allows us to awaken spiritually and to show the world that one loves God more than himself.

While there is nothing dirty about the world, the people in the world can readily choose things that they know lead to the commission of a sin. Fasting can give us strength that avoids sin, or it can awaken us to weakness by which we excuse ourselves from something important. taken over a period of time, that weakness, like water freezing in a crack, can break rock apart along faults that no one realized was there.

It is amusing to see people defending themselves when they know they may be leading people into sinful thinking, such as women who insist that it is perfectly wholesome to display as much of themselves as possible, and they pride themselves that they can still tempt a man to sin. They can draw a person to the edge of a precipice no normal person would attempt to jump off of. The water below may be very deep, but tocks below that are not immediately visible can cave in a man's head.

Our flaws appear in the light of God which have an uncanny effect of interrupting a beautiful picture. The flaw can be devastating, seen in such brilliance, but we can grow used to the incredible power of God's light and we may not respond as we first did when He revealed Himself to us. But people who love Him respond by loving Him more in response to our reaction.

He waits for us with great patience to avail ourselves of the greater abundance of His grace, and we do, we grow, and a deeper resonance develops. 

Peace be with you +

Passage

 Passage

Pope Framcis, dead at 88 Monday April 21, 2025

Pope Francis has died, and we gather to speed him on his way into the light of Christ which he tried to reveal at every turn regardless of what he suffered. He participated in the cross of Christ by His invitation, and so having suffered, he has participated in the salvation of each man, woman and child of the whole human race.

We commemorate the beloved of this world in order to count the passage of so many flames of His love. The light of God is always present in the world; let us never forget we are family, and try to reconcile differences so that we might live in peace and defeat the hatred and violence which continually assaults the world to destroy it and all of us.

Let us remember the life of Jesus in order to conform to it. Let our prayers never cease, and let no prayer be lacking to those who most need help. 

In the conflicts of the world, let our love prevail and our love of Christ prevent violence and defeat it as the failure not of love, but of the inimical being that hates what we love. Never give up praying, and never forget those we promised to pray for and add to our efforts, the intercession that saves souls, mindful that we are all on our own way to depart from this life of struggle. God help us and fill us with His light to guide us and His love to overcome evil. 

Good Friday

 

He was hidden in His humanity, yet His humanity
desired our love and we did not see what He wanted
until the lance had passed into His Heart.
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I love watching planes take off in videos on Youtube. My understanding of the phenomena involved is the same as everybody else's. so I am grateful to be able to understand at all.

Similarly, I love when Jesus shares His pain with me on Good Friday as He has done this year. He does not choose to share the bleeding, and that is fortunate because it would be messy, and, unlike St. Padre Pio, I lack a community, being a hermit, and the service rendered by such a community.

One of the sweetest impressions one gets from movies on the subject of Padre Pio, is the respect and dignity rendered by them toward one of their own. Let us be clear about stimata; they are a share of Jesus' Body and consequently, of His passion, and one way or another, His bleeding and His pain.

This year i turned 78, and He has been most generous sharing with me, and I do not deserve it. He has allowed joy to seep in around the edges with quiet little moments in which to enjoy His presence; the pain is like a violin to a fine wine or a sumptuous chocolate bar. I don't see the future as some have, but I can guess what may be around the corner, and it is frightful to say the least. People will be desperate to find one person sound and whole enough of mind that they might attempt to find some sense in the mélange from him or her. Be clear, the sharing they want cannot be, and God will not grant it except if it meets His criteria, and He judgment is high indeed.

People have already been suffering enough, or I would not suffer anything consequential. As it is, I can suffer rejection, physical pain and ill judgement enough for any ten men, and endure it by myself. There is only one person I would like for company as it is, and  He is my divine Lord, Jesus.  People respond in all sorts of way to His presence, many having no idea who He is, yet they can find comfort and delight in Him the same as me, and it is lovely to celebrate that together in Garden.

Some people do not make the connection between the pleasure of His company and the presence of Jesus in prayer, and that is a gift of contemplation in which all manner of wonders may be seen, stigmata being only one of them. They share His Body, who suffer His passion and His Spirit, and He does not spare  much for their sake. Padre Pio suffered day and night, and frequently at night at the hands of evil and demons, when he would be mercilessly beaten and mistreated, so that at one point he required surgery to repair a hernia, a procedure he underwent without anesthesia. We can glimpse his state in the Mass he celebrated with such devotion that his face wat stained with tears, contorted in suffering. Only a block of wood could be impervious to what was seen by people then. It was silent, very silent in the church during Mass with Padre Pio. People knew He was present, though it is unlikely many had any vision during that time, to explain.

And again, visions are often manifest in the lives of those who lived to pray and prayed with Jesus at their side, united into His happiness and His life itself. That is the essence of a mystical life. Life as a mystic has no subtitles, ordinarily, but there again, there are signs enough that any observer of someone in that kind of prayer cannot be mistaken. A mystic may be defined as someone who shares in the life of Jesus by experiencing His life by His grace and charity. People who were around Padre Pio while he was praying saw him transfigured, and awesome things often happened in his prayers.

A person can share in great joy and happiness, who share in His life through prayer. I know, because I shared with people whom I would unequivocally call mystics. There are many places in Scripture of this week that it is stated strange things happened during the time of His passion.

For everyone, we are called to share together in the penitence of forgiving and being forgiven, which is to say, that they shared in His healing power through means none of us can understand. To forgive is to shed mercy like a rain the desert, and forgive like men freed from the yoke of slavery and the lot of the starving and dying, impoverished and some blessed to have their burden borne by Christ Himself.

He bore all our pain and suffering, but it is a special gift when He bore our wounds and bleeding pain, and shared with us so we could witness His absolute solidarity with the human race. All this evil has forsaken and repudiated, unable to endure the goodness and holiness of Jesus, let alone His light and peace which are His abundant gift to those disposed by divine love to be enabled.

He has enabled me. He loves me and forgives me and the human race may witness His love if they wish, if they can stand to repudiate evil and we can endure His embrace, pierced and bleeding on this day we commemorate forever. 

Sin is to obtain what is desired, forsaking Christ in the process, since either we choose Jesus in a moment, or we choose our own gratification, hoping He does not see and does not know. But He does see, and He does know, and all of Heaven does, and certainly those who choose suffering instead of pain and loneliness instead of His company and His light. But there is a difference between foregoing a good thing for His sake and sinning to satisfy our needs.

I bear what He chose to give me, and I have found impervious joy in having chosen, and having been granted the opportunity to choose the divine Lord, beaten, forsaken and forgotten, denied and not chosen. What little things such treasure rest upon; it is amazing that such little implements as nails in hands and feet, and the one great lance that opened the Heart of Jesus the Lord so we may be physically present to Him in our choices and He may be present to us in His embrace.

Make no mistake, the wickedness of evil is very plain to see, and contemptuous of all who serve Jesus Christ. His light waits to fall on the dawn of this day and all souls good or bad, with the hope that He may be reunited to those who have gone astray. Therefore let us do penance denying ourselves little things, remembering what He chose to forsake so He could bless His cross with obedience to His Father. If we accept our cross, our portion of is nails and lance, it cannot be otherwise than that He will rescue us from evil and keep us safe in that way which is eternal union with the bliss of Love.

The world He created was not evil; it was perfect, created out of His perfect love as an example and statement to  all who would serve Him in life. He has spoken that word to us, and we must still finish our trials by which we attempt to make the right choices in life, and to ask to be forgiven so that He knows we have chosen Him and desire to be with Him, and not with the ones who have forsaken life.

Weeping Silence

Nature itself has been formed into a specific shape
to speak a certain word, and we are impoverished
if we pay it no heed.

Spread wide the palms of your hands, and bare your side to receive His love, that incomprehensible gift of agony which is love and without no man can draw a breath. Walk on those feet cruelly fastened to the tree, look through your blood clogged eyes on the savior of the human race.

How few they are who do, or even dare the think they could bear, such incomprehendible weight on their own frailty.

He drives in each nail on His victim loves, and cries out the lamentation that cannot be spoken because it hurts too much. He waits for His turn to say "It is is finished" without voice, without sound, without encompassing all He did in His short life.

Now, when He arranges for my frail limbs to be raised up to greet His deeds, the world still does not see what He is doing, but every deed requested by those lovers of His love are granted in spite of it all. It is a short span of time, the nailing of the innocent man to the abominable cross. His final act is to cease, to stop, to let out the last breath and not take another. His lovers mimic Him the best they can, and the world goes by in silence because there is nothing else to be done.

All His deeds will be revealed, and all our love unveiled in the midst of the unbelieving. 

They could not even disbelieve if it were not granted from above. Their haughty, arrogant snarls give way to the wave of love that will transfigure the whole earth, and reveal everything.

With my hands spread fixed to the cross I cannot reveal what He has done; I only stand still in the silence and the nothingness of the wilderness. Surely He will come soon to reveal His love to me so that I may be finished, completed His love having succeeded even with me. You cannot see, but He will reveal, and the pain will cease in the glory of His light.

Causes

 

If it can be said that a God causes or permits disasters among men, then the twentieth century has to be the epitome of evil times. All the fascist communist dictators that have paraded their arrogance on our stage have been acting out the ultimate culmination of evil over the world. If we don't want it, we should not elect narcissistic mental cases to be president of the United States, and we do not tolerate the invasion of peaceful countries because they defy the selfish obsessions of former communists.

Yet it is still possible to find traces of civilization which epitomize what humans can achieve of love and piety. That the enemy should be incapacitated is obvious to those who enjoy civilized society prcisely because it fosters diversity and freedom. 

Nations should have the right to choose their govenment and organize their lives in profitable pursuits, education and the exercise of divine love in the world.

It seems to me that coincidence is too random; that juxtaposed states among human beings happen for a reason, and the opportunity to choose in life is a treaure.

If the Lord offers you the opportunity to live your life as a religious life, dedicated and avowed to Him, you should avail yourself, because He does not always make His offer more than once in a lifetime.

There are planty of examples to follow in history, and a little research will turn up people suitable for emulation.

If tyrants walk the stage and strut their selfishness on the world's stage, it is a clear offer from God to act a different way and be promoted in that way with all His assistance. He died on the cross for the success of that enterprize.

May you be blessed to find the way, and may your way be like His, who has loved us so very well.

Pearls

Pearls result from irritation

Saint hood , of a sort, can be briefly won now and again. I suppose it is like a patch of sunlight burning through a heavy cloud, warming the earth below for a moment, to gladden the heart. In this way, we might be won over by the Lord, if only for a moment, long enough for Him to make our heart incandesc in unspeakable, and unforgettable light.

Strung together like pearls, one may fashion a whole life, even if carved out of stoney hearts, and it may make a whole wall intricately and ornately carved to stand forever in the day, for someone to see. Moved to replicate what was seen other lives may be strung together as well, miraculously from the cross itself, where our poor hearts beat bravely on until too tired to carry on.

Oh live to be pearls in the bright noon-day sun and shine with glowing hearts of joy, to be what you are in the moment, for Him. All those moments that belong to Him paint a picture that is like Him. For a moment, let Him forget the nails of the cross, to listen to the little sounds of joy.

Rule Vows and Bibliography

God give you space in which to live, and live in
happiness and peace within it. You will not find
peace in anything but God.

 

A Rule for Solitaries

For those who find themselves called by God to seek Him out and to live a life alone by virtue of not belonging to a community of monks but otherwise free to be dedicated to God while not totally withdrawn from the life of the world.

Not everyone is called to live in a monastic community. But those called to seek God and be apart from the world to seek Him in contemplation must have a guide. Whether this guide is a Rule or a confessor, a guide is necessary to avoid falling into costly errors. If you are called, then you already believe there is a God and that He involves himself in your life, and you have faith, hope and charity sufficient to obey Him. Likewise, you are present at Mass daily, and are in obedience to the Holy Church, receiving the Sacraments by which you will be strong to succeed.

 

St. Benedict has said, “We must hasten to do today what will profit us for eternity.”

God exists and He has a right to ask anything of us by virtue of having created us and keeping us in existence.

Let us resolve to seek the counsels of the priest, frequently confess our sins and attend Holy Mass daily.

 

 

Let the Rule be no burden for any person. I impose nothing on any person, but give it to my brothers and sisters as a guide on our way to God. I do not even suggest anything I would not do myself, and I respect the journey to God of every person who comes. If my example may inspire anyone, then I bless the Lord for shining so brightly, that you may take inspiration from my life.  May we walk together in love.

The times we live in are perilous for souls. This is the reason for solitaries; to offer prayer for sinners and those persecuted and tormented. Such terrors require strong measures. Since Jesus won salvation for all persons by His death, our prayers have infinitely more value in union with His sacrifice than by themselves.

 

The transition between a lay person and a religious seems to be in the depth of the conversion of the person, and the response to God’s call. I have in mind Saint Francis of Assisi who began life as a wealthy playboy, but who converted to a serious pursuit of life in God. He did not seek to enter a religious community or reform any, but he was called to restore vigor in the Church by the testimony of his life of radical poverty in contrast to his former existence. He founded an order composed of those inspired by his conversion to join him in his mission. He took vows and wrote a rule by which to live and then lived it as rigorously as he could. Clearly he changed from being a lay person to being a religious, but he did not receive Holy Orders and was not a priest nor did he seek to attempt to offer Holy Mass.  Priests were glad to serve him by offering Mass for him. Likewise, we may desire to enter more deeply into prayer and a life in which we might exclusively seek Him and seek to reform ourselves to conform to Him, responding to a call. Our calling is the reform of ourselves and watching with Jesus, conversing with Him. I have in mind also those who previously might have felt God’s call but because of circumstances were not able to respond as we wanted. Now we have the time and wish to dedicate ourselves and the remainder of our life most fully to Him. We feel as part of God’s call the need to pray for sinners and to make reparation for sin and to effect reconciliation in the world to bring peace where it does not exist and threatens humanity itself. But we most rigorously understand that we achieve none of this by our own efforts, but painfully and arduously and joyfully by uniting our sacrifices and prayers with the sacrifice and prayers of Jesus Christ and the rest of the Holy Church. We also fully understand that we are not priests and the priest has the responsibility for souls.

 

Firstly, no one should think they can prosper unless they are free to engage in the pilgrimage to God’s Kingdom. They must be healthy, and they must have a developed devotional life and must have practiced a moderate asceticism by which they have achieved some mastery of their thoughts and impulses that leaves them free. They should be unencumbered of worldly distractions, unmaterialistic and free of worldly commitments. You cannot be master of property and persons and still be master of your own soul, for either God owns your soul or the world. So let those otherwise unencumbered by illness or worldly commitments seek God in solitude. In order to do so, insofar as they are able, let them relinquish power, property and wealth and keep only what is necessary to live. If desired, a habit consisting of a lightweight black cassock for the warm season and a heavier one for the cold, and a white scapular with a black hood are your attire. A white rope cord and black shoes or sandals for your feet may be worn. Wear it remembering whom you serve and being reminded of your commitment. Otherwise dress modestly. I feel it is a good thing to wear a habit, especially during prayer or at Mass, but abide with the parish priest’s desires on the matter.

Let those who wish to seek God in solitude work for their living and give of their resources to the poor, in particular, let them greet the homeless with cheer, give of their resources to feed the homeless and pray for the homeless that they should not despair or die in desolation. If it is possible to help the homeless find a situation in life, let them do what they can. We do not live alone as long as we live on the earth. Let us greet others as we go out in the world to do our duties and let our countenance reflect the peace in our soul. While we seek solitude, we are not exempt from contact with others. Let us not live so alone we never have contact with others. Let us go deliberately about the world still seeking Christ as if we were alone.

 

Secondly, solitude and asceticism are not ends in themselves. The voice of God does not resound in the wilderness for all to hear. It must be sought and desired with all your heart for His voice is still and quiet like a night in the desert. For some He may be easily accessible, standing unseen always near the heart. For others, He may seem distant. You cannot succeed if you are not patient and humble, and therefore you must desire to find Him in your prayers and by their means unceasingly.

 

Be patient, for God moves in our life and in our soul at His own pace. Impatience can lead to unnaturally forcing something to happen which can lead to deception, or cause frustration and unnecessary fatigue. God allows us time in which to become accustomed to life with Him and to gradually see what we must learn to grow. Expecting signs and wonders can simply lead us astray and it can be difficult getting back on the true path. You cannot mistake the presence of God for anything else. The peace, joy and love are too pronounced, and He gives spiritual fruit to nourish us. He writes His will in our hearts, and we can see when we are able, like a child that learns to speak. When we realize that we have succeeded in accomplishing what He asks, our joy will be great that we have obeyed Him and grown to more closely resemble Him. Sweeter than any sign or wonder is the presence of God, and He satisfies our souls far better than anything of earth. He will work through us to transform the world if we are faithful.

 

We have spiritual enemies, clever and persistent in the ways of beguiling or wearing down our resistance with temptation or trying to distract us with things that are not true and subtly lead us to believe what is certainly not true. Beware of thoughts that lead to anger or resentment over things that do not matter that can drive a wedge between us and the ones we love or our confessor or advisor. Better to get out of bed for prayer than to give in to temptation and have to apologise to Jesus. Better to go hungry and be tired working hard than to lose a friend we cannot afford to lose, or hurt a friend by our cruel words.

 

 

 By your fruits you shall know that you truly walk on the one path whose destination is the heart of God. It should be seen by others that you are at peace and joyful and that your heart is quietly centered on God because your labors bring forth the same fruits in the world.

You must have hope. You must believe. And you may ask of God what you need, but most of all that He tell you what He wills and that He grant you the graces needed to obey Him. Consolations and spiritual occurrences are not the reason for solitude or prayer or a dedicated life. Seek always to obey and please God and leave the disposition of your soul to Him. Go simply through life, offering everything to Him as a child, in love. In this He will rejoice in you and peace will be all around you.

 

God may give us a desire. He may guide us in it to accomplish something He asks, something dear to His heart. Blessed the person who strives with all his being to do what God desires. If we do not see confirmations, then we should question the source of the desire, even if it is a holy one. If it is destroying our inner peace or filling our soul with anguish that is not in accord with what we know to be true, then we must question its source, because God does not tell a lie or inspire what is impossible. We might grow to see that we simply did not understand at first what God had asked. It will be made clear if it comes from God and we will be expected to seek all the more ardently for the truth and to correct our path and our thinking. God will never be angry with a faithful servant who asks for understanding or confesses an error or that he misunderstood. God does not lead us astray and He understands human desire, especially for holiness. We will be credited for goodness if we are honest with Him, ourselves and our confessor. Abraham believed what he could scarcely endure to hear – that he must take his only beloved son and sacrifice him on a mountain. Only at the moment of cutting his son’s throat to execute the sacrifice did God restrain His hand. If we do not in all truth have the same determination to do what we believe is God’s will believing that we heard Him right, then we need ask Him for the grace to do so. If God was testing us, then we shall have the honor of having acted with a clean conscience to carry out His will, and no man can then question our actions or integrity. God may indeed cause us to be filled with sorrow but when darkness comes unbidden it is time to fly to Him in prayer and seek Him.

 

Thirdly, do not obsess about what you should do, but keep busy and be at peace. Commend yourself into God, giving Him your whole heart, mind, will, feelings and emotions and your very body with all its unruliness and demands. You must nourish yourself and maintain cleanliness in order to be healthy, but as with every other aspect of your life, do so prayerfully, commending and beginning and ending your activities in prayer. A prayerful person may succeed in all God asks Him but a person who ignores prayer is wasting his time as a solitary and might as well live as any ordinary person free of religious commitment. It may be by leaving solitude, God may find a person and draw him back to solitude when he discovers what God meant to say. I have drawn up a schedule to follow:

 

Daily Schedule

2:00am-3:00am            Prayer

3:00am-3:30am            Coffee

3:30am-5:00am            Prayer

5:00am-5:30am            Personal Care

5:30am-7:40am            Spiritual Reading

7:40am-9:30am            Mass

9:30am-10:00am          Breakfast

11:00am-11:00pm       Prayer

12:00pm-3:00pm         Recreation, shopping, Business

3:00pm-4:00pm            Rosary

4:00pm-6:00pm            Dinner

6:00pm-7:00pm            Prayer

7:00pm                            Retire

This is my personal schedule and is only a suggestion.

 

Fourthly, let no one believe he may approach God without examining his life , revealing his sins, and repenting of them. Let a person who wishes to find God examine his heart and mind and beg His forgiveness for his sins and transgressions and ask Him for the grace to avoid sin. Let those seeking God ask Him for forgiveness and a means of making reparation.

 

Fifth , I suggest upon rising, commend yourself to God and say the Angelus. Have something to eat. At noon say the Magnificat and eat lunch. In the afternoon about three spend an hour saying the Holy Rosary. Have an evening meal about five and in the evening between the evening meal and the time you retire for the night, write in a diary about your soul and your thoughts and experiences, read the Holy Scriptures dividing the time between the Psalms, the prophets and the New Testament, and spend some time listening to pious music or playing an instrument and singing joyfully or doing some spiritual reading such as the lives of the saints. Before retiring, confess your sins to God and ask His forgiveness if there is anything on your conscience. Commend your well-being into His hands and retire. It is no dereliction of duty to take some time to walk in a park or jog a little during the day. Nor is it bad to set aside your schedule to help a person in need. There is nothing like putting theory into practice to gain insight and grow a little.

 

Sixth, if tempted, say “O my God, I worship and adore you because by your Holy Cross you have redeemed the world.” In all humility and simplicity with tenderness of heart confess your faults and temptations to the Lord. He will have mercy on His children who seek Him, serve Him and love Him because He has called them. Remember that He will not call you without it being possible to succeed in finding Him and being joined to Him in all consolation. Remember that His reward for faithfulness is everlasting. Remember His sacrifice for you in giving over His life to crucifixion at the hands of impious men. Recall the lives of the saints whose generosity in willingness to suffer for Christ was judged to be holy, and imitate the thoughts and actions of their good example.

 

It is not a sin to be tempted or to be tormented. Jesus Himself was tormented in the wilderness. God will not allow us to be tempted beyond our strength, and He will give relief in due course, particularly if we are ardent in our prayer and very honest with Him about what is happening to us. Strength comes through exercise just as faith comes through trials. The one almost never comes without the other. The sincerity of the love we profess to God will be revealed if we are humble and truthful with ourselves before God. And we will rejoice when we realize that we passed the test because God gave us the grace. Gratitude is powerful in drawing us closer to God and deeper into humility. Humility is not mushy pap, it is brutally honest and a sincere and burning desire to be correct in His eyes. I do not recommend corporal punishment of ourselves, for love can be injured by brutality. God will teach us if we truly desire to be taught, no matter how dense we may be. He will teach us a thousand lessons if that is necessary, and He will think no less of us for it.

 

 

The world does not know Him and does not seek Him, believing that it is all there is and that it is accountable to no one. The world lives by no other rule than to please itself to the ruin of all. The world seeks its own glorification and is ruled by selfishness. Since we have left these behind, we should show the God who calls us to those who have not seen Him and do not know Him. It should be carefully considered that the reason for our solitude is to seek God and find Him to be united to Him and to offer prayers and sacrifice for the salvation of souls. We should especially be mindful of those in grievous suffering, near death and who have died in desolation, especially those who have not known God and those who have lived ungodly lives. We must ask Him to be merciful to them, forgive them their sins and that God bring them home to Him in heaven. Between the decades of the Rosary, after saying the Glory Be, I recommend that we say these additional prayers:

 

 “O my Jesus, forgive us our sins, save us from the fires of hell, lead all souls to heaven, especially those who have most need of thy mercy”.

 

“Sorrowful and Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for us who have recourse to thee”.

 

“Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us”.

 

“Precious blood of Jesus, save us.”

 

“O my God, I worship and adore you because by your Holy Cross you have redeemed the world.” This prayer is particularly powerful against temptation if we keep in mind the stark difference between our pleasure and the anguish suffered by the Lord on the cross.

 

Seventh, in due course we may develop a desire to solemnize our life by vows. Let us carefully deliberate before doing so, and tell our confessor of our desire. A reason to take a vow might be that we feel God desiring it of us, and because we feel it is necessary for our spiritual journey. We should know when we are ready because we have seen confirmations of growth in our life. It would be best to make a vow on a temporary basis, and if we find no great struggle or opposition, then we might approach our confessor. If we feel peaceful and joyful in our action to profess our vows, then we might ask to make our vows perpetually.

 

 

We should do penance. Let us refrain from eating meat each morning and during Advent and Lent all day. Exercise restraint in the consumption of meals and give thanks to God for what we have to eat, and express our gratitude to God in providing the shelter in which we live, and in wearing the clothes He has provided for us. Let us give up some sleep if it seems agreeable and we can do so and remain cheerful and charitable. Doing anything for charity is penitential, especially being so toward others and especially in trials.

 

We should not our health, because if we are not alive we cannot complete the mission God has given us. Prudence is important in our exercise of asceticism. In the Garden of Gethsemane, Our Lord contemplated the Passion He was about to live, and for our salvation subjugated His will to the will of the Father. Knowing what was about to happen, nevertheless He submitted to the cruelties of His executioners, and when the moment came, submitted to being nailed to a cross. He submitted to death, giving up His life and on the third day taking up His life again. By this example we know the consequences of obedience. Let us ask God before undertaking ascetical practices, whether this would be pleasing to Him. We have little to offer, but nothing is too small to offer Him if we offer it with the greatest love. Therefore let us be satisfied with offering the little things life gives us to offer, constantly thanking God for His love and generosity. Rather than setting out to punish ourselves, let us rather seek to unite our will with God and our offerings with His sacrifice. He who called the universe into being and makes it function in an orderly fashion, knows the power of our love combined with His to transform the earth.

 

Do not lose heart. In your troubles be before Him as a little child. Offer your tears of sorrow and await Him coming to transform all your troubles in the moment He reveals his Presence to you. Then you will be able to rejoice with Him in His peace, for there is where you will find Him and be united to Him at the appointed time. In the moment of temptation or trouble, pray to Mary His Mother to take you under her mantle and hide you that you may not be found or troubled by evil.

 

Recall that we have sinned, and with Adam and Eve are subject to death. While we should not live in inordinate fear of death, we should ready ourselves for the moment God will call us. Let us keep our life in perspective, so that we are able to offer prayer and sacrifice for others, but also that we may do penance and receive forgiveness of our transgressions. A person does well who recalls their sins and God’s merciful forgiveness. A person does well not to squander the life His forgiveness has provided us. A person does well who offers sacrifice and prayer for those who do not concern themselves with them. We will have mercy if we have been merciful to others. We will enter into the Kingdom if we have forgiven those who have offended us, even if they do not forgive us our transgressions. We should ask forgiveness of God for our transgressions against others and if possible seek to mend the hearts of those we have offended. Then our conscience will not trouble us and we may have peace and succeed in seeking God. Remember that our feelings only feel, they do not think. Let it be your will that you forgive, and it will be so. “God is love, and he who abides in love, abides in God, and God in him”. Recall the Mount of the Transfiguration as a presage to the Ascension and the Descent of the Holy Spirit. He will not leave us alone or abandon us to desolation forever. Nor will He call us to anything we do not have the grace to do. He will lead us to those to whom we should testify.

 

Let us read the Holy Scriptures, study the Gospels and Epistles, and set out to live by the words of God. Carefully consider the words of God and ask Him to help you understand what you cannot understand. This way we may amend our life to be as God desires.

Amen

 BIBLIOGRAPHY

New Seeds of Contemplation Thomas Merton New Directions Book  Abbey of Gethsemane 2007

Das Weinachts –Oratorium 2004 edel CLASSICS GMBH Hamburg Germany

The Little Flowers of Saint Francis Dover Thrift Editions Dover Publications

St. Teresa of Avila, The Interior Castle Study Edition ICS Publications 2010

The Imitation of Christ Thomas A Kempis Dover Thrift Publications

The Cloud of Unknowing edited by Evelyn Underhill

Abandonment fo Divine Providence Jean Pierre de Coussade

The New American Bible St. Joseph Edition Catholic Book Publishing

The Collected Works of St. John of the Cross ICS Publications 1991

The Rule of St. Benedict Liturgical Press Collegville Minnesota 1981

The Way of Perfection Kieran Kavanugh Study edition ICS Publications 2000

The Collected Works of St. Teresa of Avila Volume Three Kieran Kavanaugh OCD ICS Publications 1985

Padre Pio the Stigmatist rev. Charles Carty tan Books 1963

Conjectures of an guilty Bystander Thomas Merton Image 2014

The Philokalia The Complete Text Volume Two GFH Palmer 1981

Thomas Merton The Seven Story Mountain Harvest Books Harcourt Inc. 1998

Toward God Michael casey Liguori 1996

Behold the Pierced One Joseph Ratzinger Ignatius Press 1984

Mother Theresa IN My Own Words Grammercy Books New York 1996

St. Therese of Lisieux Story of a Soul Marc Foley OCD ICS Publication 2005

A Holy Life St. Bernadette of Lourdes Ignatius Press 2005

The Magnificent Prayers of Saint Bridget of Sweden Tan Books 1940

Therese Neumann Adalbert vogl 1987 Tan Books

Autobiography & Diary of Saint Gemma Galgani

Sister Wendy’s Book of Saints Dorling Kindersly 1998

Journey of Faith The Story of the Archdiocese  Editions du Signe Ersel, Laughlin 2013

 

Seeing Revisited

In giving His gifts, sometimes He gives a gift of sight with which to see the condition of His children. While the gift may be the occasion for a deep consolation, at the same time, we see not what we like, but what He wants us to see. The seeing can be painful, gut wrenching and terrible, in that we can apparently do nothing to lift up those we see. He has a way of imparting the suffering on us, so that we see as He saw on the cross the day He died.

At the saem time, it has a grating way of diminishing us, which is befitting His messengers who are meant to be conduits of His love. But as such, we nevertheless grow and experience His love, and marvel that such joy could coexist with so much pain.

A person in such a state can be forgiven if he is weighed down, weary and in considerable misery. Few if any see this, but if they do, they recognize the ocean of love contained within. Yet with the invisible gifts of His love, He waits for us to reconstruct the world, torn to pieces and laid low to die, slammed to the earth in rage and hate.

Our world contains the angels of God, and His Holy Spirit, and legions of hellleaping up  like great flames to scorch the earth and consume all who get too close. The pain of such a condition is beyond human words. Thus He prays for us, cradles us in His arms and reassures us with what we have scarcely seen,

It is needless to say, that those who see, need your prayers, so that at least, they are not discouraged.